Most teachers and other school professionals feel unprepared and apprehensive about reaching out to provide support to grieving students . Dyregrov et al. [7] interviewed a sample of teachers from primary and secondary schools and found that, although the school personnel had high levels of empathy and commitment towards grieving students, they expressed limited knowledge about how child bereavement affects school performance, concentration, and learning. They also expressed guilt for not doing more for bereaved children at school. Similar findings were found in a survey conducted in 2012 by the American Federation of Teachers, the New York Life Foundation, Tiller Inc., and Hart Research Associates [8]. More than 1200 educators reported that the single most important barrier preventing them from providing this support was insufficient training and/or professional development, with 93% reporting that they had never received any training on how to support grieving children during their education or subsequent professional development. This contrasts starkly to children’s experience of loss—approximately 1 in 20 children experiences the death of a parent by the age of 16 years and approximately 9 in 10 report grieving the death of a close friend or family member by 18 years of age [9].

Children, like adults, will struggle with understanding and accepting the death and the impact it has on them and their family [1]. Parents, teachers, and other caring adults are often reluctant to talk with children who are grieving or even to raise the topic out of a fear of upsetting children by raising the topic or causing further distress by saying the “wrong thing.” Avoiding discussion is rarely helpful and often isolates children at a time when they are most in need of support and assistance. Children may also misinterpret silence by adults about the death as an indication that adults are unaware, unconcerned, or unwilling to be of assistance. Children may then conclude that the expression of their intense and complicated feelings is inappropriate, that adults do not feel that the person who died is worthy of being mourned, or that the relationship the children have with the deceased is not considered to be of sufficient value. The common reactions of shame or guilt experienced by grieving children can be intensified by this silence. Children may then model this avoidant behavior by not sharing their feelings for fear of upsetting their caregivers.

Since the direct provision of bereavement services to children in a school is often not possible for child mental health professionals who are not employed or contracted by the school district, child mental health professionals should establish a relationship with local and regional schools before a crisis event so that they can provide guidance and training about how to best support grieving students and staff after an event. Ideally, training and professional development on this topic would be provided prior to a school incident or crisis; while staff may acutely appreciate the importance of such training after a crisis event involving deaths, their capacity to learn the information and develop sufficient confidence in their skills is markedly diminished when they themselves are grieving or traumatized.

Establishing a collaborative relationship with a school or district prior to a crisis event allows the consultant to become aware of the distinct characteristics, history, and/or values of a school community. Schools differ significantly on a variety of factors including: the level of participation of families and school staff in school governance; resources available for support services; integration of mental health, wellness, and addiction services into normal operations; and sensitivity about different cultures served by the school. This knowledge can be critical in developing an effective recovery plan for the school or district, as well as providing effective bereavement support for individual students and staff.

There are a broad range of services that child mental health professionals can provide after a school crisis to assist grieving students and staff, including:

Children typically experience at least temporary academic challenges after the death of a close friend or family member. Some children may instead respond to a death by overachieving in school. The effect the loss has on learning may first appear weeks or even months later. Many bereaved children have been found to experience a reduction in school grades and an increase in school dropout rates [10] and teachers commonly perceive grieving students as struggling with learning, showing reduced achievement in tests, and experiencing learning setbacks [11]. The academic effect of bereavement may be prolonged and intermittent support may indeed be needed throughout children’s school career [12].

Difficulty concentrating and distractibility, anxiety, depressed mood, and sleep difficulties may limit a student’s learning capacity. Children with learning problems that predated the loss may experience a marked worsening in their academic performance.